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He said it very grandly and without any humor intended.
The supply of foot-care productshas a moral imperative?
You may laugh, Inspector, but then you don t understand chiropody as I do.
The Spongg empire is built on four major foot treatments. Without them we are
nothing. Anyone can make special scissors, insoles and corn plasters our
selling point is our successful foot preparations. Winsum and Loosum aren t
interested in my factory or distribution. They want my patents. With their
sales network and my cures for verrucas, corns, athlete s foot and bunions,
they could wipe the world s feet free of ailments forever or not.
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Not? inquired Mary.
Precisely.They may retain our patents but decide to withhold them from the
world market. Ointments that soothe but don t cure is where thereal money
lies. In contrast, Spongg s has always been committed to a public service in
the foot-care market. If I wanted to play it like Winsum s, I could be a
multibillionaire by now.
Spongg s voice had been getting higher and higher as he explained all this.
He was obviously quite impassioned by the magnitude of the situation.
Without competition from us, they could charge what they want. Chiropody
would become a gold mine, and that greedy bastard Solomon Grundy wants the
lot!
He had gone a bright shade of red but soon calmed himself, took a sip of tea,
apologized to Mary for swearing in her presence and then said, To think the
Jellyman will be shaking hands and honoring Solomon on Saturday isobscene to
my mind, Inspector. If the Jellyman understood anything about feet at all, he
would not be honoring Grundy but enacting legislation against him.
Do you know where Mr. Dumpty had been living this past year?
I m afraid not. Aside from at the charity benefit, I ve not seen him.
Jack put down his tea and took the picture of Tom Thomm from his pocket.
Have you ever seen this man?
Spongg put on his glasses and stared at the picture.
Yes, I think with Humpty a couple of times but not for a while.
What about him? asked Jack, passing him a photo of Winkie.
No, I m afraid not.
What about Laura Garibaldi?
That was tragic, Inspector. Truly tragic. I introduced them, for my sins.
Laura and I were on the Reading clay-pigeon shooting team. She was a fine shot
and a good woman. I don t think Humpty really deserved her.
You ve been very kind, said Jack, and I m sorry that my questioning seemed
harsh at times.
Please think nothing of it, said Spongg. Come, I ll see you out.
They rose and walked between the faux-ancient-stone ruins as the parrot took
flight and flashed its exotic blue tail feathers.
That s quite a bird, murmured Mary.
Norwegian blue, said Spongg admiringly. Beautifulplumage.
29. Lola Vavoom
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Lola Vavoom had been one of the greatest British actresses of the seventies
and eighties. Discovered in 1969 at the cosmetics counter of Littlewoods, she
was cast as Deirdre Furlong in the pilot episode of65, Walrus Street. Leaving
after four years, she made her break to the big screen as maverick cop Julie
Hathaway in the highly successfulThe Streets of Wootton Bassett . A string of
hits followed:The Adzuki Bean Murders ,My Sister Used to Keep Geese andFancy
Free in Ludlow , for which she won a Milton. By the middle of the eighties she
was commanding two million dollars a picture. Then disaster. A string of flops
culminating in 1989 sThe Eyre Affair and unceasing speculation over the
contents of her bathroom cupboard caused her to withdraw completely. Her
attendance at the 2004 Spongg Charity Benefit was her first public appearance
in fourteen years.
FromValleyhills Movie Guide
How many? asked Jack, who had taken five minutes out to eat a sandwich after
his return from a brief trip to St. Cerebellum s.
Ninety-seven and rising, said Baker. We don t have time to take
statements; Ashley and Tibbit are taking names and addresses and checking to
see if they have any pertinent information.
Do they?
Not yet. They just want to help.
News of Humpty s death had elicited an unpredictable reaction among his
ex-girlfriends, paramours, affairs and liaisons. The arrival of floral
tributes outside Grimm s Road had begun as soon as his death was announced,
and they had now spilled into the road. There was talk of a candlelight vigil
that night; the long trail of ex-lovers who wanted to help with the
investigation had begun a few hours ago and now absorbed all available
manpower, which was never that great to begin with. The one girlfriend they
did want to speak to, however, had yet to turn up.
Thanks, Baker. Tell Ashley and Tibbit to come straight to me if they hear
anything potentially relevant.
Baker nodded and picked up his mobile.
So what did you discover? Jack asked Mary, who had also grabbed a quick
bite to eat.
Not much, she replied, looking at her notes. Winkie s supervisor at Winsum
and Loosum s was a man named Whelan, who said that Winkie was an excellent
worker and much liked. The narcolepsy was a problem, but they worked around
it Winsum s has a good record of employing people with health issues. I
couldn t fault them. There were several occasions when jokes could have been
made at a narcoleptic s expense, but no one made them.
Did he seem to them like the sort of man about to try to blackmail a
killer?
He had been preoccupied and a bit jumpy about what, no one could say. Are
you still thinking Solomon Grundy might be involved?
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I don t think so. He laid all his cards on the table for us, and as you say,
he s got enough money to write off a two-million-pound scam without thinking.
And as Briggs pointed out, itwas fourteen years ago.
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