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manifestation of a congenital heart defect.
When he spoke, his voice was as flinty as the granite hills that had birthed
him.
"Yes?"
"Hey, Smitty," said Remo in a bright voice.
"Remo, I have reports of a battle going on at Petersburg National
Battlefield."
"Guess that's why they call it a battlefield, right?"
"Remo, this is serious!"
"No," corrected Remo, "this is over."
"Over?"
"Over. As in the boys can start going home now."
"But I have reports of other reenactment units moving on Virginia."
"Well, when they get here they can move right out again. The Blue and the Gray
have patched things up."
"What happened?"
"Mongo Mouse dropped by, and everybody came to their senses."
"Remo, you are babbling."
A squeaky voice piped up. "No, Emperor, everything Remo says is true. Mongo
came, along with Dingbat and others of his gallant company."
"They dropped down in balloons," Remo added.
"Balloons, Remo?"
"Big pink ones. Lit up like bottles of calamine lotion with light bulbs
inside."
"Remo, you are not yourself."
"Hey, I just had a pleasant afternoon. Don't spoil it with your ulcerous
crabbing."
"Ulcerous crabbing? For the first time in over a century we have civil war!"
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"I told you," Remo said patiently. "It's over. It was a great big
misunderstanding. When the balloons showed up, everyone simmered right down.
Mickey Weisinger made a big reconciliation speech and won 'em all over.
They've laid down their muskets, and there won't be any more trouble. Chiun
and I hardly had to do anything. Isn't that great?"
There was a pause on the line.
"Remo," Smith said in a cautious voice, "I have some bad news for you."
"Shoot."
"I have hit another stone wall in the search for your parents."
"Aw. Too bad. But I know you'll keep trying, Smitty."
"That is just it," pressed Smith. "I have reached an absolute dead end. There
is no other avenue to search."
"Gee, that's disappointing," said Remo.
"I am calling off the search. Do not ever raise this subject again."
Remo's voice diminished as he turned from the telephone and said, "Chiun, he's
calling off the search for my parents."
"At least he tried," said Chiun without concern.
Remo's voice came back to the telephone receiver. "I know you tried, Smitty.
Appreciate it. Really."
"Remo, you are not talking or acting like yourself."
"Who else would I talk and act like? Daniel Boone?"
"You are too calm, too relaxed, too accepting."
"I told you I feel pretty mellow."
"Remo, what happened out there today?"
"Told you. The war's over. Hallelujah."
"Remo, did anything unusual happen out in the park?"
"Well, lemme see," Remo said slowly. "I can't think of anything except the
yellow bomb."
"What yellow bomb?"
"You hung up before I could mention it last time. A black helicopter buzzed
the Crater, dropped this thing that looked like a traffic light except all the
lights were yellow and when it hit, everything turned really yellow."
"What do you mean-everything turned really yellow?"
"We were running away because we thought it was a bomb."
"It was," inserted Chiun calmly.
"It didn't explode. But there was flash, I guess. The sky turned yellow. So
did the grass and trees and everything. Then the Union prisoners started
pouring out of the pit, and were they scared. Every one of them babbling about
the yellow light."
"Then what happened?"
"Chiun and I went to investigate and when we got to the Crater, the bomb or
whatever it was started screaming and melting into a puddle of slag."
"In other words, it self-destructed?"
"Now that you put it that way, yeah. Sure."
Chiun's thin voice added, "You forgot about the man in the pit, Remo. Tell
Emperor Smith about him."
"Oh, right," said Remo. "Before the bomb melted. We found a Union guy in the
pit. He wasn't like the others, who were scared. He was kinda down."
"Down? Do you mean depressed?"
"Yeah, and he claimed after the yellow light exploded in his face, everything
turned blue. That part doesn't make much sense, I know."
"Actually it does," said Smith.
"It does?"
"Yes, it was a phenomenon of color where if one stares at a certain color for
a long time, then looks away, he will see the complementary color as an
afterimage in his retina."
"Blue complements yellow?"
"I believe it does," said Smith, saving his US. map file and bringing up
another file.
"Then I guess red insults green, huh?" Remo chuckled.
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"Describe this yellow light," Smith said without humor.
"It was very very bright. But we didn't look directly into it."
"But you say it frightened those who did?"
"Scared the living beans out of them," said Remo.
"Now, this pink light. Describe it."
"Pink. Nice. Pleasant."
"Bright pink?"
"Happy pink," said Remo.
"Very happy pink," said Chiun. [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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